So now the EU is in charge of how I decide to build my app, and is trying to dictate what suppliers I can use?
What if I decide that crash reporting is an essential service (it is), and the EU's lawyers decide that it's not? Who is going to pay my legal fees, and potential fine? I should be on the hook because some schmuck uses a service that I provide for free (which essentially means I'm paying for it with my time), and is upset that I may not be handling his data in the way that the EU says I should be? The sane solution would be to allow me to tell this individual that he cannot use the app if he doesn't consent. But here comes the EU telling me that I must allow him to use the app.
> So now the EU is in charge of how I decide to build my app, and is trying to dictate what suppliers I can use?
No, the EU only stipulates that you are not allowed to sell, leak or otherwise slander personal data from EU residents without their freely given consent, and makes you liable for that.
IANAL, but I think there is no reason to fear too much, though I would stay on the safe side regarding interpretation. And remember that anybody can report you for anything to the authorities, or sue you already; if you are prosecuted you'll have to pay your legal fees and fines whether it's about GDPR or not.
What if I decide that crash reporting is an essential service (it is), and the EU's lawyers decide that it's not? Who is going to pay my legal fees, and potential fine? I should be on the hook because some schmuck uses a service that I provide for free (which essentially means I'm paying for it with my time), and is upset that I may not be handling his data in the way that the EU says I should be? The sane solution would be to allow me to tell this individual that he cannot use the app if he doesn't consent. But here comes the EU telling me that I must allow him to use the app.